Hey yal! I meant to get this post up on Monday but.....life happens...lol. honestly, I spent all day Monday doing yard work, my puppy giant fur baby thought it would be a nice gift to dig up the entire drip system in the backyard. Its such a sad sight back there. Now that it's getting cooler ( no more 3 digit temps! whoohoo!) I can finally go out and do some damage control.
Anyway, since its Respect Week here in Las Vegas, I just wanted to share my point of view on the subject.
RESPECT YOUR FRIENDS
This week came at the perfect time because Jordyn has recently been dealing with some less than respectful activities from her 'friend' at school..
Is it just me or are "mean girls" getting younger and younger?
Anyway, since its Respect Week here in Las Vegas, I just wanted to share my point of view on the subject.
RESPECT YOUR FRIENDS
This week came at the perfect time because Jordyn has recently been dealing with some less than respectful activities from her 'friend' at school..
Is it just me or are "mean girls" getting younger and younger?
I mean, Jordyn had her first run in with a mean girl in pre-k then last year in kinder there was a girl who bullied everyone and now....she is dealing with a "frenemy". I mean for goodness sakes she's in the first grade. Has this generation of parents failed so miserably that our first graders are now having to deal with the mean girl antics that would normally not present themselves until they were at least preteens? Really, how hard is it to teach our children a little respect?
Just a few examples of this "frenemy"
EXAMPLE 1: The little girl in Jordyns class claims to be her friend, but turns around and gets really mad if Jordyn does well in class. Jordyn gets an award, her "friend" starts to pout exclaim "WHAT?..JORDYN, REALLY? she gets an attitude and says it should have been her. Then tells Jordyn she is mad at her for getting the award.
EXAMPLE 2: Jordyn doesn't want to play what she wants to play, her "friend" in turn tells Jordyn she doesn't want to sit with her at lunch then proceeds to tell other kids secrets while rolling her eyes at Jordyn.
EXAMPLE 3: Jordyn wears a bow tie to school, the vice principle tells her how much she loves it, her 'friend' then tells her to take it off and let her wear it. ( she doesn't of course.)
I could go on and on but these are just a few examples of how NOT to be a friend. I'm not raising this child so I cannot comment on what goes on in her household that causes her to act this way. I can however, use this situation to teach my child the importance of respecting your friends.
See, after each situation took place, Jordyn would tell me all about it. She would tell me how she felt. I then would ask her " How do you think friends are supposed to make you feel?' and she would reply " friends shouldn't make you feel bad, they should make you feel good." I would then ask " does this make you feel good?" and her answer would be "no"
We would have long in depth conversations about how important it is that to respect your friends and how your friends are supposed to respect, appreciate and encourage you. I think a lot of parents think our children don't have the mental capacity to understand deep conversations when in all reality, they do. They enjoy them and they thrive on them.
One day, I asked her what she wanted to do and she said she wanted to give her another chance to be a real friend. Finally, when the girls behavior didn't change, Jordyn decided to give up on the friendship.
When the girl would ask her to play, Jordyn would say " no thank you." Over and over again until the girl finally asked " why aren't you talking to me?" Jordyn finally said to her " well, you were being mean to me and friends aren't mean to each other."
RESPECTING OTHERS.
EXAMPLE 2: Jordyn doesn't want to play what she wants to play, her "friend" in turn tells Jordyn she doesn't want to sit with her at lunch then proceeds to tell other kids secrets while rolling her eyes at Jordyn.
EXAMPLE 3: Jordyn wears a bow tie to school, the vice principle tells her how much she loves it, her 'friend' then tells her to take it off and let her wear it. ( she doesn't of course.)
I could go on and on but these are just a few examples of how NOT to be a friend. I'm not raising this child so I cannot comment on what goes on in her household that causes her to act this way. I can however, use this situation to teach my child the importance of respecting your friends.
See, after each situation took place, Jordyn would tell me all about it. She would tell me how she felt. I then would ask her " How do you think friends are supposed to make you feel?' and she would reply " friends shouldn't make you feel bad, they should make you feel good." I would then ask " does this make you feel good?" and her answer would be "no"
We would have long in depth conversations about how important it is that to respect your friends and how your friends are supposed to respect, appreciate and encourage you. I think a lot of parents think our children don't have the mental capacity to understand deep conversations when in all reality, they do. They enjoy them and they thrive on them.
One day, I asked her what she wanted to do and she said she wanted to give her another chance to be a real friend. Finally, when the girls behavior didn't change, Jordyn decided to give up on the friendship.
When the girl would ask her to play, Jordyn would say " no thank you." Over and over again until the girl finally asked " why aren't you talking to me?" Jordyn finally said to her " well, you were being mean to me and friends aren't mean to each other."
RESPECTING OTHERS.
I feel like there is an epidemic of disrespectful children running around. Did I miss something? OH! parents are utilizing iPads and television sets as make shift baby sitters. I forgot......
The thing is, theres a lot of 'activities' online about teaching your child to respect others when in all actuality, respect is something that is learned through imitation....children learn to respect others by watching the people in their lives respect others. Children learn to disrespect others by watching shows on tv where being a snotty brat is glamorized.
I get it, its easy to be rude and forget to say please and thank you, but as a parent, we don't have the luxury of "forgetting" Each time you don't say please or thank you....you can bet your child notices, and while you've been trying to cram it into their brain to use these words, once they notice that you, the person they love most in the world, doesn't use their manners.......they won't.....no matter how many times that app on their iPad sing the 'manners' song.
Practice a little kindness, say thank you to everyone, don't overspeak people, wait your turn, don't rip the Starbucks barista a new one because your Venti soy chai had too much foam, and I guarantee your kid will eagerly follow in your footsteps.
RESPECT YOURSELF
The thing is, theres a lot of 'activities' online about teaching your child to respect others when in all actuality, respect is something that is learned through imitation....children learn to respect others by watching the people in their lives respect others. Children learn to disrespect others by watching shows on tv where being a snotty brat is glamorized.
I get it, its easy to be rude and forget to say please and thank you, but as a parent, we don't have the luxury of "forgetting" Each time you don't say please or thank you....you can bet your child notices, and while you've been trying to cram it into their brain to use these words, once they notice that you, the person they love most in the world, doesn't use their manners.......they won't.....no matter how many times that app on their iPad sing the 'manners' song.
Practice a little kindness, say thank you to everyone, don't overspeak people, wait your turn, don't rip the Starbucks barista a new one because your Venti soy chai had too much foam, and I guarantee your kid will eagerly follow in your footsteps.
RESPECT YOURSELF
This is a conversation that needs to be had early on.
I think mothers are failing to teach their daughters that they if they don't have respect for themselves, no one else will. Little girls are twerking online, these children know the lyrics to songs they shouldn't even be listening to, posting videos of themselves fighting, cursing, calling themselves "bitches"...the list goes on...this generation is failing at parenting because they think its so 'cute' that their young children are behaving this way.
convenience has taken place of motherhood.
The most important thing we can do for our daughters is teach them to love and respect themselves. There really is no secret other than sit down and have a conversation, have multiple conversations. Jam it into their brain, SHOW THEM that you value and respect them for simply being them and they will in turn, value and respect themselves and not settle for anyone disrespecting them.
Even as children, they need to know that anyone disrespecting them is not to be tolerated and they can and should speak up.
Ultimately, teaching your child respect is as simple as having conversations and leading by example. There is no activity on paper that will take the place of this.
Happy respect week!
Xo, Jeanice.
I think mothers are failing to teach their daughters that they if they don't have respect for themselves, no one else will. Little girls are twerking online, these children know the lyrics to songs they shouldn't even be listening to, posting videos of themselves fighting, cursing, calling themselves "bitches"...the list goes on...this generation is failing at parenting because they think its so 'cute' that their young children are behaving this way.
convenience has taken place of motherhood.
The most important thing we can do for our daughters is teach them to love and respect themselves. There really is no secret other than sit down and have a conversation, have multiple conversations. Jam it into their brain, SHOW THEM that you value and respect them for simply being them and they will in turn, value and respect themselves and not settle for anyone disrespecting them.
Even as children, they need to know that anyone disrespecting them is not to be tolerated and they can and should speak up.
Ultimately, teaching your child respect is as simple as having conversations and leading by example. There is no activity on paper that will take the place of this.
Happy respect week!
Xo, Jeanice.
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